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Why Is Confidence So Attractive?

Confidence seems to be the one thing that most people find extremely attractive. But what is it about confidence that makes it so sexy? Why are we more likely to be drawn to someone who is confident than to someone who is insecure or needy?

Confident people are noticeable, they stand out. They have a certain air about them that makes you want to get to know them. You want to know what makes them so self-assured. They’re intriguing and we’re beguiled.

Someone who knows how to do something well and owns that ability.  They’re typically comfortable in their own skin and well-adjusted. They have a sense of ease which is also quite appealing.  Confident people seem to know what they want and are not afraid to ask for it or go after it. Nor are they afraid to express themselves and they don’t try to come across as something they’re not.

Remember that quiet confidence should not to be confused with outright arrogance, which is based in insecurity.  When someone feels the need to boast, they actually lack confidence and subconsciously need to fill that gap in themselves with others’ validation.  People who lack confidence are generally insecure. They’re often apprehensive and anxious. Many need constant reassurance and attention and take a great deal of energy.

 

 

The Power of Habit

About The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business

With eye-opening insight into the habits of individuals, corporations, and societies, Duhigg demonstrates how a simple habit loop—a cue, a routine, and reward—is the key to transforming behavior. More than just an ideas book, The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business is a thoroughly entertaining narrative that will change the way you think, personally and professionally.

A young woman walks into a laboratory. Over the past two years, she has transformed almost every aspect of her life. She has quit smoking, run a marathon, and been promoted at work. The patterns inside her brain, neurologists discover, have fundamentally changed.

Marketers at Procter & Gamble study videos of people making their beds. They are desperately trying to figure out how to sell a new product called Febreze, on track to be one of the biggest flops in company history. Suddenly, one of them detects a nearly imperceptible pattern—and with a slight shift in advertising, Febreze goes on to earn a billion dollars a year.

An untested CEO takes over one of the largest companies in America. His first order of business is attacking a single pattern among his employees—how they approach worker safety—and soon the firm, Alcoa, becomes the top performer in the Dow Jones.

What do all these people have in common? They achieved success by focusing on the patterns that shape every aspect of our lives.

They succeeded by transforming habits.

In The Power of Habit, award-winning New York Times business reporter Charles Duhigg takes us to the thrilling edge of scientific discoveries that explain why habits exist and how they can be changed. With penetrating intelligence and an ability to distill vast amounts of information into engrossing narratives, Duhigg brings to life a whole new understanding of human nature and its potential for transformation.

Along the way we learn why some people and companies struggle to change, despite years of trying, while others seem to remake themselves overnight. We visit laboratories where neuroscientists explore how habits work and where, exactly, they reside in our brains. We discover how the right habits were crucial to the success of Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps, Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz, and civil-rights hero Martin Luther King, Jr. We go inside Procter & Gamble, Target superstores, Rick Warren’s Saddleback Church, NFL locker rooms, and the nation’s largest hospitals and see how implementing so-called keystone habits can earn billions and mean the difference between failure and success, life and death.

At its core, The Power of Habit contains an exhilarating argument: The key to exercising regularly, losing weight, raising exceptional children, becoming more productive, building revolutionary companies and social movements, and achieving success is understanding how habits work.

Habits aren’t destiny. As Charles Duhigg shows, by harnessing this new science, we can transform our businesses, our communities, and our lives.

The Golden Rule of habit change that study after study has shown is among the most powerful tools for creating change.  You can never truly extinguish bad habits.  Rather, to change a habit, you must keep the old cue, and deliver the old reward, but insert a new routine.  That’s the rule: If you use the same cue, and provide the same reward, you can shift the routine and change the habit.  Almost any behavior can be transformed if the cue and reward stay the same.

Ulthera or Thermage?

Which is better Ulthera or Thermage….I have followed both technologies since their inception, Thermage for about the last 10 to 12 years, and Ultherapy by Ulthera for the past 4 years.  Based on the science behind them and the patient satisfaction results, Ultherapy by Ulthera is a superior treatment.

Ultherapy by Ulthera is the only FDA approved device for both tightening and lifting of the muscles and skin of the face and neck, including the eye brows.  Ultherapy is the only technology available that uses ultrasound to heat the muscles and skin to create both deep and superficial collagen production.  The level of the treatment is visualized on an ultrasound screen to insure that the energy is being delivered to the proper level.

The muscle fascia or SMAS is targeted in the neck and face.  This is the same layer that s surgeons tighten when they perform surgical face lifts.  Ulthera energy goes deeper than any other energy device, 4.5 mm for the SMAS, and 3.5 mm for the deep skin collagen production.  The patient satisfaction rate with Ulthera is about 90% in the clinical studies.

Thermage is a radio frequency technology device that heats the skin and subcutaneous tissue superficially.  Although Thermage has been improved over the years, it’s main problems have been a very high patient dissatisfaction rate (up to 66%), and a very painful patient experience.  Ulthera can cause discomfort as well, but if patients are enduring pain, they appreciate a result that they can notice.

Ultherapy, featured in Vogue, is a safe and effective non-invasive ultrasound (US) treatment that can lift and tighten facial skin and muscle without downtime.  According to Catherine Piercy, author of the well written Vogue article, “Ulthera…is making it much easier to imagine a world in which hooded lids, falling cheeks, and lazy jaw lines can be treated without a single incision”.

Originally FDA approved for lifting eyebrows non-surgically,Ulthera’s unique state of the art technology is now used to lift and tighten the face, neck, and other areas of the body.  It has successfully treated the lines along the upper lip that are most difficult to treat with injectables.

Ultherapy is performed in the office with only ultrasound gel applied to the skin.   An ultrasound screen image allows the technician  to visualize the level of treatment before US energy is applied to the targeted tissue.  The treatment takes from 45 to 90 minutes depending on the area(s) treated.  Cost also depends on the areas treated.

What about the discomfort level?  Again from Ms. Piercy in Vogue, “If anything, Ultherapy’s greatest drawback may be the pain factor, which ranges from a hot prickling sensation to short but intense bursts of discomfort”.  Patients can be given oral medications or local anesthetic nerve block injections if needed, but the majority of Ulthera patients are able to tolerate a properly performed treatment with a topical numbing cream.

Although many patients see immediate lifting results, the ultimate results do not happen overnight, but gradually over time.  It can take up to 2-3 months for optimal rejuvenation.   Ulthera has been used for close to 2 years.  Some patients treated 1 1/2  to 2 years ago are now returning for second treatments.  Though they still appear improved from their pre-treatment “before” photos, most desire further improvement, further turning back the hands of time.  Patients feel and notice the tightening to the point of being satisfied. After two years of personal research and due diligence about the clinical benefits of Ulthera, as well as being impressed by the findings and experience of worldwide  respected cosmetic physicians, I  decided to add Ulthera to our practice 2 years ago.  We have been overwhelmingly pleased with the results as have our patients.  As with all cosmetic treatments, results will vary depending on the skill,experience, and aesthetic sense of the treating physician, physician’s assistant, nurse, or staff member.  Results will also depend on proper diagnosis and patient selection.  Side effects may include some bruising, swelling, and a feeling of tightness in the days after the procedure.

Ultherapy by Ulthera has been recently featured  on Dr. Oz, The Doctors,as well as on Real Self reviews, links which you may access for further information about this amazing state of the art technology.

 

10 Benefits of Adding Coconut Oil to Your Diet

1. Coconut Oil Contains a Unique Combination of Fatty Acids With Powerful Medicinal Properties

Coconut oil has been demonized in the past because it contains saturated fat. In fact, coconut oil is one of the richest sources of saturated fats known to man, with almost 90% of the fatty acids in it being saturated.

However, new data is showing that saturated fats are harmless. Many massive studies that include hundreds of thousands of people prove that the whole “artery-clogging” idea was a myth.

Additionally, coconut oil doesn’t contain your average run-of-the-mill saturated fats like you would find in cheese or steak.

No, they contain Medium Chain Triglycerides (MCTs) – which are fatty acids of a medium length.

Most of the fatty acids in the diet are long-chain fatty acids, but the medium-chain fatty acids in coconut oil are metabolized differently.

They go straight to the liver from the digestive tract, where they are used as a quick source energy or turned into so-called ketone bodies, which can have therapeutic effects on brain disorders like epilepsy and Alzheimer’s.

2. Populations That Eat a LOT of Coconut Are Among The Healthiest People on The Planet

 

Coconut is kind of an “exotic” food in the Western world, primarily consumed by health conscious people.

However, in some parts of the world, coconut is a dietary staple that people have thrived on for many generations.

The best example of such a population is the

Tokelauans, which live in the South Pacific.

They eat over 60% of their calories from coconuts and are the biggest consumers of saturated fat in the world.

These people are in excellent health, with no evidence of heart disease.

Another example of a population that eats a lot of coconut and remains in excellent health is the Kitavans.

 

3. Coconut Oil Can Increase Your Energy Expenditure, Helping You Burn More Fat

 

Obesity is currently one of the biggest health problems in the world.

While some people think obesity is only a matter of calories, others (myself included) believe that the sources of those calories are critical too.

It is a fact that different foods affect our bodies and hormones in different ways. In this regard, a calorie is NOT a calorie.

The medium-chain triglycerides (MCTs) in coconut oil can increase energy expenditure compared to the same amount of calories from longer chain fats.

One study found that 15-30 grams of MCTs per day increased 24 hour energy expenditure by 5%, totalling about 120 calories per day.

 

4. The Lauric Acid in Coconut Oil Can Kill Bacteria, Viruses and Fungi, Helping to Stave Off Infections

 

Almost 50% of the fatty acids in coconut oil is the 12-carbon  Lauric Acid.  When coconut oil is enzymatically digested, it also forms a monoglyceride called monolaurin.

Both lauric acid and monolaurin can kill harmful pathogens like bacteria, viruses and fungi.

For example, these substances have been shown to kill the bacteria Staphylococcus Aureus (a very dangerous pathogen) and the yeast Candida Albicans, a common source of yeast infections in humans.

 

5. Coconut Oil Can Kill Your Hunger, Making You Eat Less Without Even Trying

 

One interesting feature of coconut oil is that it can reduce your hunger.

This may be related to the way the fatty acids in it are metabolized, because ketone bodies can have an appetite reducing effect.  In one study, varying amounts of medium and long chain triglycerides were fed to 6 healthy men.

The men eating the most MCTs ate 256 fewer calories per day, on average.

Another study in 14 healthy men discovered that those who ate the most MCTs at breakfast ate significantly fewer calories at lunch.

These studies were small and only done for a short period of time. If this effect were to persist over the long term, it could have a dramatic influence on body weight over a period of several years.

 

6. The Fatty Acids in Coconut Oil Are Turned into Ketones, Which Can Reduce Seizures

 

A so-called ketogenic (low carb, higher fat) diet is currrently being studied to treat various disorders.

The best known therapeutic application of this diet is treating drug-resistant epilepsy in children.

For some reason, this diet can dramatically reduce the rate of seizures in epileptic children, even those who haven’t had success with multiple different types of drugs.

Because the MCTs in coconut oil get shipped to the liver and turned into ketone bodies, they are often used in epileptic patients to induce ketosis while allowing for a bit more carbs in the diet.

 

7. Coconut Oil Can Improve Blood Cholesterol Levels and May Lower Your Risk of Heart Disease

 

Coconut oil is loaded with saturated fats, which actually do not harm the blood lipid profile like previously thought.

Saturated fats raise HDL (the good) cholesterol and change the LDL cholesterol to a benign subtype.

In one study in 40 women, coconut oil reduced Total and LDL cholesterol while increasing HDL compared to soybean oil.  Also improves blood coagulation factors and antioxidant status.

This improvement in cardiovascular risk factors should theoretically lead to a reduced risk of heart disease over the long term.

 

8. Coconut Oil Can Protect Hair Against Damage, Moisturize Skin and Function as Sunscreen

 

Coconut oil can serve various purposes that have nothing to do with eating it.

Many people are using it for cosmetic purposes and to improve the health and appearance of their skin and hair.

Studies on individuals with dry skin show that coconut oil can improve the moisture and lipid content of the skin.

Coconut oil can also be very protective against hair damage and one study shows effectiveness as sunscreen, blocking about 20% of the sun’s ultraviolet rays.

Another application is using it like mouthwash in a process called oil pulling, which can kill some of the harmful bacteria in the mouth, improve dental health and reduce bad breath.

 

9. The Fatty Acids in Coconut Oil Can Boost Brain Function in Alzheimer’s Patients

 

Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause of dementia worldwide and occurs primarily in elderly individuals.

In Alzheimer’s patients there appears be reduced ability to use glucose for energy in certain parts of the brain.

Ketone bodies can supply energy for the brain and researchers have speculated that ketones can provide an alternative energy source for these malfunctioning cells and reduce symptoms of Alzheimer’s.

In one 2006 study, consumption of medium chain triglycerides led to immediate improvement in brain function in patients with milder forms of Alzheimer’s.

Other studies support these findings and medium chain triglycerides are being intensively studied as potential therapeutic agents in Alzheimer’s disease.

 

10. Coconut Oil Can Help You Lose Fat, Especially The Dangerous Fat in Your Abdominal Cavity

 

Given that coconut oil can reduce appetite and increase fat burning, it makes sense that it can also help you lose weight.

Coconut oil appears to be especially effective in reducing abdominal fat, which lodges in the abdominal cavity and around organs.

This is the most dangerous fat of all and is highly associated with many Western diseases.

Waist circumference is easily measured and is a great marker for the amount of fat in the abdominal cavity.

A study in 40 women with abdominal obesity, supplementing with 30 mL (1 ounce) of coconut oil per day lead to a significant reduction in both BMI and waist circumference in a period of 12 weeks.

Another study in 20 obese males noted a reduction in waist circumference of 2.86 cm (1.1 inches) after 4 weeks of 30 mL (1 ounce) of coconut oil per day.

This number may not seem too impressive on the surface, but be aware that these people aren’t adding exercise or restricting calories. They’re losing significant amounts of abdominal fat simply by adding coconut oil to their diet.

SIMPLE WAYS TO BEAT BLOAT

STOP FAKING IT

Replacing your usual indulgences with sugar-free gum and diet soda can feel virtuous, but zero-calorie good intentions can backfire. Some artificial sweeteners contain sorbitol, a sugar alcohol that can’t be absorbed by your gastrointestinal tract.  They tend to ferment there and produce a lot of bacteria and gas, making them a huge cause of bloating.  It’s just another reminder that nothing is ever really free.

DON’T PASS THE SALT
Salt attracts moisture—think about how salt shakers cake up when it’s humid outside. When you have a higher concentration of sodium in your bloodstream, your body holds on to water to dilute the concentration. Drinking water also keeps your sodium-potassium balance in check.

FLUSH IT
Some fruits, like watermelon and cranberries, act as natural diuretics that reduce fluid retention. Still, don’t just reach for the nearest Edible Arrangement. The diuretic effect can be canceled out by sugar, which causes bloating. Go for vegetables that are relatively low in fructose, like asparagus and cucumber. Vitamin C supplements have a diuretic effect, meaning the help the body get rid of excess fluid. Be sure to drink plenty of fluids when taking them. Remember the more water you drink the less water your body will hold on to,

EAT AN AVOCADO
So you’ve slipped up and snacked on a handful (or six) of salty pretzels. The good news is that avocados and other potassium-rich foods combat puffiness by balancing excess sodium and reducing water retention. “Look for foods that are high in potassium or that have a balance of potassium and sodium, like celery.
DRY OUT
There are lots of reasons to skip that second (or third) glass of wine, and you can now add bloating to the list. Don’t let the fact that alcohol is a diuretic fool you. By keeping your body from processing things properly, alcohol can blow you up. Alcohol is very acid-forming in the body, and an acidic body tends to hold on to excess water weight. Caffeine can have a similar effect.” And then there’s the fact that alcohol and salty snacks were made for each other, so consuming one usually means too much of the other.
When you do indulge, avoid sugary and boil-brewed alcohols, like tequila, rum, and beer, which has the added problem of carbonation. They’re extremely processed, Tequila is one step away from agave, which is over 90 percent fructose. The purest hard liquor—i.e., the one with the least sugar—is vodka, so Russians have the right idea.

CHECK YOUR MEDICINE CABINET
Like alcohol, certain drugs can affect the body’s ability to hold on to water. Birth control pills, steroids, and even ibuprofen are the worst offenders. It’s tempting to chalk up bloating to your diet, but if you’re on a new medication and notice that you feel puffy or crampy, you might want to discuss other options with your doctor. You should also talk to your physician if you’ve changed your diet and other habits and still feel bloated. It could be a sign that something more serious is going on.

WORK IT OUT
Is there anything exercise doesn’t fix? With bloating, it doesn’t hurt to get physical. The GI tract is muscle, It gets flabby if you’re not exercising.  Physical exertion can stimulate gastrointestinal contractions known as peristalsis, making digestion easier.

EAT LIKE A LADY (AS YOUR GRANDMOTHER WOULD SAY)
Wolfing your food isn’t just bad manners. Fast eaters tend to take in more air and therefore experience more gas. Those other bad habits Grandma warned you about, like chewing gum, sucking on hard candy, and smoking, also increase gulped air. Carbonation can be a problem, though it depends on your sensitivity. Mere seltzer water will get to some people, while others are left unfazed by several San Pellegrinos a day. And if you’re about to sit down to a feast beginning with a green salad, which gets the digestive process rolling. All those enzymes at the beginning help you digest the rest of the food that follows.

Bloating, that feeling of fullness and swelling, is uncomfortable and can be distressing. While it might seem contradictory, you can usually fix fluid retention in your body by increasing your fluid intake, including drinking more water. As you drink more water, your body releases fluids, potentially leading to less bloating.  Mild water retention can be caused by fluctuating hormone levels, hot or humid weather, sunburns and standing for long periods of time.  As the fluids rehydrate your body, your body learns it is no longer at risk of dehydration, so it will release the retained fluids, leading to reduced swelling.

5 Ways to Show Your Love

The quality of our relationship depends on the effort we are willing to put into them. No one just lands in a happy and blissful marriage, it takes a little effort. The more willing we are to put our thoughts, prayers and efforts into our marriages, the more fun, lively and fulfilling they will be.

Here are a few ways to put extra thought and energy into making them feel loved.

Hold the criticism and pour out the praise!

OK, it’s true — sometimes you need to vent your frustrations. But, people need praise too — and a lot more of it.  Studies show that successful marriages have positive interactions that outweigh the negative by 5 to 1. So, if you absolutely have to complain about something, make sure it’s not all you do. Love and praise your them.

Pray for them

Not just because they need God’s help, but also because prayer helps you too. By taking time each day to pray for your mate, you are training your brain to consider their needs, goals and things that they might be struggling with.  Also pray for added inspiration to know how you can best support them as their spouse.

Treat them how you want them to become

This is true in all relationships. Positive reinforcement goes a lot further than complaints. Find ways to compliment your husband and look for the good in him.

Love them, serve them and surprise them

The best marriages are a result of effort and work that is put into them. Put effort into loving your spouse. Plan ahead and leave a cute note for them to find. Treat them to a surprise vacation. Give them tickets to see their favorite sports team or whatever they are interested in. Hide behind the front door and wrap them in a HUGE hug when they gets home. Whatever it is, put your whole heart into it.

Know their language

Sure, flooding their email with heart-felt notes is cute, but if their love language is physical touch, it’s not going to mean as much. Figure out what their love language is- words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, receiving gifts.

To love them effectively, you need to know what makes them tick. Sometimes we love others the way that we like to be loved ourselves, and then wonder what went wrong. The best way to show love is to actively try to learn more about them and cater to their needs and preferences as they come up. And yes, they change over time. So have fun, be proactive and go with the flow.